In 1957, my maternal grandmother or Ah Mah as I would call her died a few days after she gave birth to my auntie. In those days, anyone who passes away suddenly and especially due to reasons such as dying from causes relating to childbirth is considered bad luck or ‘bu ji li’ to the family. My Ah Mah, who was a Taoist was hastily given a burial in the night without proper Taoist ceremonial send off and no other relatives were present at her funeral. The reason was also due to the fact that my grandfather wanted to ease the painful memories of my Ah Mah’s death from her children and so he did not want any grand ceremonial burial for her.
Ah Mah’s tomb was a modest slab of rock with red ink wordings which was located near an old Mandai gas station and left to its own devices for many years. Fast forward to 2007, during a family’s discussion, it was decided that my Ah Mah’s grave should be exhumed and placed in a temple next to my grandfather’s urn so she could also be better taken care of by the temple’s caretaker.
On a certain sunny day in 2007, the entire family of around 20 people were rounded off to grandmother’s modest grave in order to exhume her grave.
As much as I would have liked to do so, I could not chant for her as she was Taoist and we were of different denomination. And so, we engaged the help of Taoist priests to do the rites in order to rest her spirit and my uncle, her son carried a wax umbrella over the grave to protect her spirit while the hired workers proceeded to dig deep into the soil in order to reach the remains of my Ah Mah.
At the first strike of the soil with the shovel, the dogs in the entire kampong or neighborhood started howling at the top of their lungs – loudly. It sent a chill down everyone’s back but no one said a word as the rites was in place and the Taoist priests continued with their prayers, chanting away. As soon as the workers dug deep enough to reach my Ah Mah’s body, there was an extraordinary bright light, it looked as if there were lights coming down from heavens to my Ah Mah’s grave.
I was not the only one who saw those lights as my little nephew who was all of 7 years old exclaimed loudly to all around that the light was blinding and asked if it was going to rain because the ‘thunder’ looked so bright. He was immediately told to keep quiet by the elders who saw nothing but sunny skies and thought that he was fussing around. The priests gave each other a knowing look, said nothing and continued chanting. The other person who saw this was my mom and another aunt.
As the workers dug deeper, the lights grew brighter, and as the shovel came down for the final time before reaching my Ah Mah’s body, I closed my eyes as the lights were by this time blindingly bright and I asked my mom to do the same as well and to enjoy the moment before my Ah Mah’s soul was released. As the shovel hit just above my Ah Mah’s bones, there was a humongous bolt of light, it was blinding and the five of us who could see (my 7 years old nephew, my mother, aunt and myself) the lights took in a deep breath and exclaimed loudly.
After lying in that grave for 50 years without a proper burial and unable to leave for a better place in heaven or to be reincarnated, my Ah Mah was finally FREED.
The gods were all around her that day as she was released into a better realm. She was at long last vindicated. Her spirit was strong and it was clear that she is in a good place now.
After the rites were completed, I told my mom who was a skeptic that Ah Mah would visit her first in 10 day’s time followed in quick succession with the rest of her siblings. My mom and aunts could not believe what they were hearing from me and they gave me disapproving looks. It is hard to convince anyone when they could not see, hear or feel what I do. Instead of making a fuss, I kept quiet and reminded everyone that Ah Mah will come back in 10 day’s time and asked them to watch out for the signs.
Unsurprisingly, as predicted, Ah Mah did make connections with my mom, but it was not as scary as you would think as she came to my mom in a dream. In close succession, she made connections with my other aunts the same way. She gave each of my aunts messages that she could not tell them for the last 50years which I shall not repeat here so as to respect their privacy.
I still think about my Ah Mah and I know that that she is in a better place now. On that day in 2007, my Ah Mah was released from her grave and she was at long last happy.
May her soul rests in peace forever.
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